The World's Biggest Puddle
Let’s take a note, folks. Unlike the hotel, Mandalay has exactly nothing to do with pirates, and is not even anywhere close to a bay. We spent about 24 hours here before hopping on a flight to Inle Lake, and other than some lost sunglasses, a very interesting chat with a taxi driver whom I shared lunch with at a little hole-in-the-wall café, and watching an army of old ladies build an entire city block’s worth of road by HAND, nothing noteworthy really happened here.
No, the next significant stop on our tour through Myanmar’s ‘Golden Triangle’ was Inle Lake, and it exceeded all of our expectations by a country mile.
When we were told to head to Inle Lake, I didn't really give it two thoughts.. I mean sure, it sounds nice – a huge watershed surrounded by mountains, and deeply immersed in culture, but we never, ever expected it to be as cool as it was. As with most of Myanmar, the press just isn't there, and that's a good thing.
And it didn’t immediately impress, either. When we got off the plane in Heho in Shan state and started driving through the Burmese countryside, we didn’t see anything that even resembled a lake for about forty minutes – just a bunch of low, green hills and sleepy little villages. But coming down the road into Nyaungshwe, the low green hills parted into a massive valley, ringed by mountains and with massive, shallow lake nestled inside.
The whole of Inle Lake is very shallow – less than four meters (twelve feet) in most parts in the dry season, and no more than six meters (twenty feet) in the wet season. But despite its minimal depth, the breadth of this lake is stunning – it’s kind of like the world’s biggest puddle – and it’s an integral part of the life of people around the lake.
The Long-Neck Karen are just one of many tribes whose lives revolve around the lake.
Not only is the lake home to several fish species, some of which are endemic and only appear here, but it also supports vast, floating gardens to feed the population. Everything that happens here involves the lake in one way or another. The markets float on the water, the villages float on the water, the temples float on the water; the entire way of life of the Shan people revolves around this big ol’ puddle.
Red Mountain Winery
We found out on our first full day there that there is, however, one thing to do near Inle that doesn’t completely involve the lake. Of course, it’s a nice bike ride through some pretty sunflower fields from Nyaungshwe to the Red Mountain Winery, but once you get there the views are fantastic, and the wine is not too shabby either (apparently it’s the best winery in Myanmar…what they don’t tell you is that there might only be one!).
That’s about the only thing we did that didn’t involve a boat. Later that evening, we had a couple beers at the night market, ate at a little Shan restaurant, and called it a night; the next morning was an early one as we’d be doing the grand tour of the lake via the world’s most obnoxiously loud motor canoe.
As previously mentioned, Inle is massive. It’s almost too big to see in a day, even at the best of times. Thing is, our day on the lake was the only day that it decided to literally DUMP rain, so it wasn’t exactly the ‘best of times.’ And yet we couldn’t have had a better time – we dressed up in our best rain garb, equipped as many umbrellas as we could hold, and motored out. Even though we were thoroughly treated to the tourist track – we were shuttled through the silver shop, the cigar factory, and the lotus looms like a couple of dupes – but because of the weather we were literally the only people there.
And even if we did get completely suckered by the first (of many) of Inle lake’s famous fishermen that we saw – he took us for like five whole dollars in exchange for a few pictures – we were entranced by the way he used his legs to maneuver the boat while fishing using a reed basket and a line.
We spent the rest of our day between the 5-day rotating market, the "Jumping Cat" temple, and the collection of pagodas on the top of the mountain behind the market, recently reclaimed from the jungle - all while getting completely and utterly soaked.
Markets make for great photo opportunities, and this one was no different, except in one regard. In many places in Asia, the most famous markets are magnets for tourists to snap photos and the people there to harass the tourists for money for said photos. There's some question as to whether or not the markets that we see as tourists are really even 'functional' markets at all, or just shows put on for visitors.
We did not get that impression here. First off, there weren't many tourists kicking around at all, though that could have been due to the weather. Secondly, there were tons of locals braving the rain to get their fresh veggies, flowers, clothing, and tools for the week. Thirdly, no one harassed us for money the whole time!
Well, except this lady.
It was incredibly refreshing, and wandering behind the market and up the hill to play among the pagodas was an even bigger reward. There were more tourists up here, but it still had a very distinctly local flavour, with livestock roaming freely among the pagodas. monks praying in the mountaintop temple, and incense burning. The whole experience during this day, despite getting taken a couple of times for money, felt distinctly local.
Dunno guys, I think she likes cats.
Finally, on our way back to Nyaungshwe, we stopped at the "Jumping Cat" monastery. This used to be famous for a) the fact that it's floating in the middle of a lake and b) the cats that the monks here trained to jump through hoops (bored much?), but now they're just kind of ornery and walking all over the rafters. It was still pretty funny though, and Rachel was, of course, in heaven at the mere mention of a kitten to cuddle.
Grumpy cat.
And after a very wet ride back through the canals surrounding the lake, we were pumped to treat ourselves to some Indian food at the Innlay Indian Hut with our ever so gracious host, ‘Stan.’
It’s an amazing thing, the influence of Western pop culture. Just when you think you’re in the middle of nowhere, in the Shan state of Burma of all places, you see a little slice of something that makes you do a double-take. Enter…Stan. This guy is the world’s biggest Eminem fan. He cooks bomb-ass Indian food for a living. And his whole restaurant is centered around the theme of 8-Mile. It was one of the most ridiculous things we’ve ever seen and we died laughing. Want another laugh? Read his Tripadvisor ‘diss tracks’ here. You can’t make this shit up.
So after a few brewskis and more than a few not-entirely-laughing-with-you chuckles, we hit the hay. The next day, we woke up and took a big bike ride around the lake, using the trip to wave goodbye to the amazing scenery, fantastic food, and better than sub-par wine.
Happy trails!
So we grabbed our bags and headed to the bus station, saying farewell in Inle lake and awaiting our bus…that apparently left the next day.
I guess buying bus tickets is not one of my strong suits.
Anyhow, another $20 solved that particular problem, and on our way to Yangon we go. Clearly, Rachel would be taking care of travel arrangements from hereon out.
Pretty, funny, and much better than me at planning travel.
